My favorite book on processing our “stories,” especially the ones that keep us stuck in negativities, is “The Marriage of Spirit: Enlightened Living in Today’s World” by Leslie Temple-Thurston.
In uomo cerca donna Bitonto the first part of the book she teaches us the cosmic laws of living in a dualistic world. In uomo cerca donna Manfredonia the second part she walks you through three very powerful processing techniques meant to help dislodge the grip our shadows have on us. The first processing technique — uomo cerca donna Palermo polarity processing — I will outline here.
There are 7 steps to the Polarity Processing Technique.
- Pick an experience.
- Write a description of the experience.
- Pick out the theme words and phrases.
- Make a list of the theme words and phrases.
- Find the opposites.
- Offer it up with a prayer.
- Wait for grace.
Start by writing out in detail a story that has gripped you. Write out all the details, the feelings and thoughts related to this story. Just let it flow until you have extinguished your view from every angle on this story.
Next go through with a highlighter and highlight all the theme words and phrases that trigger you.
On a separate sheet of paper draw a line down the center. On the left side write out all the theme words. This may take several sheets of paper.
Next on the left side of each word write down the opposite word or phrase. For instance, if you wrote uomo cerca donna Potenza hate on the left side, write down donna cerca uomo Asti love on the right side of the paper. If the opposites don’t immediately come to you, use a thesaurus.
The opposite words are the ones you are repressing out of your whole experience of life. They are in your shadow. This process is about transcending duality and embracing both sides as your true and whole experience.
Now offer a prayer of gratitude to god, spirit, angels or whatever you refer to as your higher self. And humbly wait for grace to help heal these imbalances within you.
My new favorite book this season is by May McCarthy called The Path to Wealth: Seven Spiritual Steps to Abundance. I usually avoid gimmicky sounding books, but this one came across my radar while listening to George Noory’s radio show – Coast to Coast AM.
What I like best about her work is the way she blends her business savviness with her spirituality. For instance, she calls her higher-self the Chief Spiritual Officer (CSO).
Her book outlines a 7 step gratitude practice.
- Read something inspiration for about 10 minutes.
- Write a letter to your CSO.
- Read the letter out loud and with emotion.
- Using your imagination visualize what you are creating in your life.
- Notice the gentle and not so gentle nudges from your CSO.
- Celebrate and record in your demonstration journal all the ways your CSO has guided you.
- Right before you go to bed make a quick list of gratitudes for the day and make a quick list of people you need to forgive and forgive them.
I added this practice to my morning practices and it has really made a huge difference in my life. I especially like writing down all the daily guidances I get from my CSO in my demonstration journal.
Below is a template for the Daily CSO Letter. Try it for 30 days.
Exercise Write out a CSO letter using the following guide:
Dear CSO, Thank you for my . . .
(List what you have and are grateful for.)
Thank you for my . . .
(List what you want as gratitude statements, as though you already have them.)
Thank you, CSO, for your universal power operating in my life. For all this good and more, I give great thanks. I now release these words to the law, truth, and power of the universe and know that it is done.
With gratitude and love,
Why not Wake Up this Morning — Rumi
Recovering Our Body: The Moving Cycle
“In the first stage of the Moving Cycle, we acknowledge what we feel, or what we weren’t letting ourselves feel. This starts out as a very physical process, one of tracking and reporting sensations in the body in order to reawaken our natural ability to tell when we are harming ourselves” (p.71).
“Our ability to feel and express our physical experience is the foundation of recovery, the bedrock of joyful and satisfying action in the world” (p. 71)
Owning is “the act of telling the complete truth about one’s experience, of seeing everything that occurs within us to be our own creation” (p. 71)
“When we take 100 percent of the responsibility for our current experience, not confusing it with childhood wounding (for which we were not responsible), we can then reclaim the power to do things differently. As long as we make others responsible for how we feel or for what is happening to us, we give them power over our very aliveness, and the only way we can feel alive is to control them. Taking responsibility cuts through codependency as well” (p. 72)
“The essential problem behind the inability to take responsibility is a lack of boundaries, or inadequate limits. … When are needs are not with such a boundary, the body’s energy continues to rush out into space. This kind of unbounded energy is frightening on a primal level — the feeling is similar to falling off a cliff through open space” (p. 73)
We must practice letting our bodies be the containers for our feelings and emotions. And so, we relearn trusting our bodies.
“We must be able to sense the difference between our own and other people’s movement energy, and still keep our boundaries” (p. 73).
During Acceptance we address our core imprints of shame and wrongness. “Shame lives in the body in several ways. First, it translates to a poor body image … Second, an imprint of wrongness lodges in certain parts of the body causing tension, desensitization, injury, or illness…. Third, and most important of all, the lack of love that we feel for ourselves affects our breathing. By constricting our breathing we cut off our ability to feel, thereby defending ourselves from unrequited pain or threatening pleasure” (p. 74)
“The Acceptance phase has to do with getting the love back” (p. 75).
“The Action Phase begins when we can sustain uncritical and loving attention to ourselves” (p. 75).
“The assumption inherent in the Action phase is that in order for change to become real, in order for love to mean anything, it must be manifested in the world” (p. 76)
“Action makes us producers in the world rather than consumers” (p. 76)
PS — The story I told about the dead coming back to life is found on 2013 Coast to Coast AM interview with Dr. Sam Parnia and can be watched here on youtube.
Focusing by Eugene Gendlin
Focusing moves inward, drawing on information from the deeper, wiser self – the body. — Eugene Gendlin
The key to this practice is understanding the “felt-sense.” A felt-sense is a deep down level of awareness that comes in fuzzy and unknown. It is a feeling, not an emotion or thoughts, of a physical nature. It is a body awareness of a situation or person or event. It is an internal aura that encompasses everything you feel and know about a given subject at a given time.
The Six Movements of Focusing
- Clear a Space
- Felt Sense
- Get a Handle
1. CLEAR A SPACE
Now ask yourself, “How do I feel? Why don’t I feel wonderful right now? What is bugging me on this particular day?
Stay Quiet. Listen. Let what comes come. Don’t get attached to the problems let them all come in and out of focus.
The say, “Well except for all of these, I’m fine.”
Do you feel a small increase of well-being in you?
2. FELT-SENSE OF THE PROBLEM
Ask which problem feels the worst right now. Ask which one hurts the most, feels the heaviest, the biggest, the sharpest, the most prickly or clammy or sticky — or just choose one problem.
Don’t go into the problem. You must get down past all the noise in your head to the felt sense of the problem.
What do you sense in your body when you recall the whole of that problem?
Sense all of it, the sense of the whole thing, the murky discomfort or the unclear body-sense of it.
The felt-sense is the holistic, unclear sense of the whole thing. — Eugene Gendlin
3. FINDING A HANDLE
What is the quality of the felt-sense?
What one word, phrase, or image comes out of this felt-sense?
This is not analysis (perception versus interpretation).
Avoid forcing words into the felt-sense. Let it come to you with its own essence. Or try one word gently.
What you are looking for is something that comes along with a body shift, the whole felt-sense stirs just slightly and eases a little. It might only be a small shift.
4. RESONATING HANDLE AND FELT-SENSE
Take the word or image you got from the third movement and check it against the felt-sense. Make sure they click precisely into place — a perfect fit. Ask (but don’t answer): Is that right?
There should be a felted response, some deep breath inside, some felt release again, letting you know that the words are right.
It is alright if, on its own accord, the feeling or the word or image changes, as you peforming the matching procedure.
You should get an Yes, Oh Yes, That’s it feeling.
Now let yourself feel that.
If a big shift, an opening, and a bodily release have already come during the earlier movements, go directly the the sixth movement.
Ask Open Ended Questions like:
What is, about the whole problem, that makes me so _________________?
What does the felt-sense need?
What is the worst of this?
What comes swiftly is old information, let the felt-sense stir and from there the answer will emerge.
Welcome what came. Be glad it spoke.
It is only one step of the problem, not the last.
Now that you know where it is, you can leave it and come back to it later.
About three years ago I decided to create these audio / visual talks to accompany Jack Kornfield’s book A Path with Heart. Since the blog shows things in date order, I decided to put all those talks in one blog post in the order of the chapters.
- Chapter One – Did I Love Well?
- Chapter Two – Stopping the War
- Chapter Three – Take the One Seat
- Chapter Four – Necessary Healing
- Chapter FIve – Training the Puppy Mind
- Chapter Six – Turning Straw into Gold
- Chapter Seven – Naming the Demons
- Chapter Eight – Difficult Problems and Insistent Visitors
- Chapter Eleven – Searching for the Buddha
Last year I gave you the basic steps in creating a vision board. See this link for that blog post.
Here is a new idea for creating your Vision Board this year.
Use the layout of the Feng Shui bagua to position your images on your poster board. This not only gives you the areas of your life to focus on, but it gives you the proper energetic positioning too.
Again the most important thing is to use your heart and feel your way into 2015’s goals and have fun with it.
I just completed my vision board for 2015 in this baqua format. The energy vortex flowing from it is palpable and extraordinary. It feels like the universe and my board are conspiring to manifest these visions.
life coach, life coaching, psychotherapist, couples counselor
I recently watched a documentary about Carl Jung on youtube called Matter of Heart (1986). It is a good primer on Jung’s Analytical Psychology.
I urge you to click the link to this video and take the time to watch this 1 hour and 45 minute video on what I believe to be the most important message on psychological and spiritual growth of our time.
Perhaps his most important message is that psyche is really real. In fact, psyche is the only real thing in this world; everything else is an illusion. In this idea Jung began the marriage between the eastern and western philosophy of psyche.
These Jungian analysts have a urgent message about saving the planet from ultimate catastrophe. Confront your shadow, reconcile the opposites within, and wrestle like Jacob with god itself. (This is what Jung called the individuation journey.) And then, and only then, do we have a chance to skirt by the looming world wars threatening all life on this planet.
Here is a talk I gave on March 15, 2014 to the All Reality group in Santa Monica.
I speak about the split between ego and soul, how this shows up in dreams, and then move into the inner world by talking about lucid dreaming and astral projection.
I never resonated with The Secret, and in particular, the Abraham-Hicks material. It’s not that I didn’t believe in the law of attraction. It was more about the damage to self-esteem that I witnessed in my clients when it did not work for them. Also, I despise any system that claims to be the end-all-be-all for everything. The only concept that might apply for the end-all-be-all is death; and nowadays I doubt even that. Furthermore, these approaches did not honor the role of other worldly beings; call them angels, gods, spirit guides, ancestors, etc. What matters is acknowledging the co-creating process between you and these other worldly beings.
As some of you know, I love GaiamTV.com. One of my favorite hosts on this site is Regina Meredith. Last month I watched her interview with Jean Slatter, the author of Hiring the Heavens: A Practical Guide to Developing Working Relationships with the Spirits of Creation and became very excited about her simple no nonsense approach to manifesting.
Jean Slatter’s drawing about the relationship of you and the other worldly beings is key to understanding how and why her “Hiring the Heavens” process works. (See drawing.) The stars are staff from heaven assisting you in your pursuits.
She explains how to hire a temporary spiritual agent for the small tasks; and how to form a spiritual committee for the larger projects. Using the simplicity of Asking and Receiving which reminds me of Matthew 7:7 — Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you — Slatter suggests only a few guidelines to assist in your “Hiring the Heavens” process: Be Playful, Cultivate an Attitude of Gratitude, Intend for the Highest Good, Feel your Wants, Have Faith, Stay Unattached and Be Patient.
About Converising with your spiritual staff Slatter wrote:
Just be open and aware, listen for what your spiritual workforce is trying to tell you. Discover your mode of receiving inspiration. Pay attention to the synchronicities and seeming coincidences that show up, and then follow their lead. It will begin happening with such frequency that you’ll have no doubt Spirit is involved. You’ll just know. It’s like a friend talking to you. The transmissions will be as clear as day.
As soon as I began following Slatter’s “Hiring the Heavens” process my manifesting efficacy increased remarkably. I can’t recommend her book enough.
May you all begin hiring your spiritual staff and manifest all you desire in life that has the most benevolent outcome for all.